The language of Laughter-Part 1

Many people asked me this question: How can you be funny? The answer isn't that obvious, actually. In humor, as in all other literary subjects, there are patterns to follow.

Lesson 1:Choice of words.
In a fantasy, impact is often delivered with powerful words. this doesn't mean that you have to use that many complicated words/phrases, just the right ones. Here's an example:

1)The rapier contacted, a canvas has been opened across the skin. Crimson liquid gently trickled through the canvas to land on the ground, increasing the productivity for the local flora and fauna by approximately 0.3%

2)The blade struck, and blood ran red.
Which one's better?

In humor, it's the same thing. Try to find funny-sounding words.
Here's an example(read out loud to see the difference)
1)What's the capital of Japan?Mitsubishi
2)What is the capital of japan?Toyota.
Although the answers both mean the same(a car manufacturer), clearly a) sounds better

2)Similarities.

Often, a person is most attracted to things he can relate to. For instance, my favorite blog is Andy's, which isn' t very funny(when one thinks 100% objectively) but is so similiar to my brand of humor that it could sometimes be hard to see the difference. the only slight difference is the topics, I deal more with concepts such as ideas, religions, government types(eg, A Girl I Like, Chuananity, Casiocracy), while he deals with events and conversations more(eg, day 1 behind the wheel, real vulgar, stuff like that).

3)Emphasis,emphasis, emphasis
Often emphasis on a single word could change the entire meaning of a sentence. Here's an example(emphasis is in italics)
1)What is said:I didn't say Yuanmashita is a idiot
Meaning:just what it syas, no implications

2)I didn't say Yuanmashita is a idiot
Meaning:Somebody else said it

2)I didn't say Yuanmashita is a idiot
Meaning: I really didn't say that

2)I didn't say Yuanmashita is a idiot
Meaning: I implied it

2)I didn't say Yuanmashita is a idiot
Meaning: I said somebody else is a idiot

2)I didn't say Yuanmashita is a idiot
Meaning:He was one in the past or future

2)I didn't say Yuanmashita is a idiot
Meaning: He's more than a single idiot, presumably plural form is suitable

2)I didn't say Yuanmashita is a idiot
Meaning: He is other, presumably worse things.